This is my first summer staying at home with the kids in nearly four years.  I am just going to be really honest, with the hopes that someone will completely identify or give me amazing advice.  My kids are bad.....  They are!  I love them with every breathe that I take, but they embarrass me endlessly.  They embarrass me at supermarkets, restaurants, the park, swimming in the lake, and so on.  Crimson walks up to strangers telling them about her farting, Caylon bumps into strangers, Rylee does not understand how to wear a dress like a "lady", and Clover whines about EVERYTHING.  I am slowly learning that school was created for two reasons;  educating children, and giving parents a break from those children.
  How do we survive the summer as parents of more than one child?  I feel like I am becoming a clown day after day, not the parent that I strive to be.  How do I begin to entertain these bored children for almost nine hours of sunlight??  The park is a great choice.  We live there.  The park in Pell City is amazing!  They have an enclosed Kids Castle and a huge water area with sand and a beautiful pier.   I try to take them after noon and stay there until four, and yet they still scream and throw things at me when it is time to leave.  So my job to entertain them seems like a failure when there are at least six parents giving me that "death stare".   Yeah, we live in the day of DHR and all.....but you know that look.  The look that screams "Beat them!  Kids aren't supposed to act that way!".  I smile and pack my screaming kids in the car thinking that maybe they will get used to our schedule and do better.  They never do.  Do I beat them like all those parents would like me to or do I hope for the best the next day?
   I love days at home.  Days where the computer is my friend, the kids are playing with each other and our  cats, and walking to the road picking blackberries is the most vigorous activity that we see.  Those days make me happy.  Except.....the kids destroy my house, like vicious rats.  They throw every toy from childbirth onto the floor, and they have contests to see which one of them can succeed into grounding Gushers in the floor.  I then become a demon that they hate to see.  That demon one that yells and cannot figure out why they act that way when we are having a relaxing day.  I do not mean to be that way, but it seems inevitable.
  To sum it up:  How do I end this vicious cycle?  Am I bad parent?  What is the stay at home mom's survival list?  Where the hell do I find it?  And are my kids teaming up against me to see what it is like when I go "ape shit crazy"???
  Other than all of the above....These children are my everything.  I adore them.  I just do not want to be the person that ruins their summer.

As far as I can see....

For the past several weeks, I have been going to Clay County on the weekends.  If you have read my very awful out of  character statuses on Facebook, you know why :)  If not, well, just elaborate.  I have been staying at my Maw Maw Yates house, whom I adore with every part of me.  That house is where I remember some of the best points of my childhood.  Just seeing her and talking to her reminds me of who I am, and why I am the way I am.  Also, it reminds me of the things that I can do change myself for the better and for my children.  If you have never come in contact with Ruby Yates, you are really missing out.  She is one of the best Christian women I have ever met, and one of the sweetest, most caring grandmothers that exists. 
  When things go bad, it's always nice that you can go back home.  Home means a lot of different things to a lot of people.  Home is where your heart is.  My heart is in Clay County.  It doesn't matter where I live or what I have....my heart is there.  Taking my children there and seeing them do the things that I did when I was a child makes me realize that that is where their heart is too.  And that is a beautiful thing to see when you are a parent.  I am so proud of who they are today, but when I see them happy in a place that I was truly happy, it makes me realize that I am the luckiest person in the world.  No matter how hard these kids push me or how mad they make me, they are who they are because I have shaped them because of roots I already have inside of me.  Roots that I never knew existed in them.  Roots that I forgot existed in me. I am so blessed.  I really am.  I may not enjoy some of things going on in my life, but God has given me everything I need.  I will do big things with that.  I can't wait to share them with all of you! 

Sometimes in life you are lucky to make friends that are like family

My best friend and her family's house burned down today.  This happens quite often to families everywhere, but it really seems to hit the spot when it is so close to home.  This family is amazing.  If you don't know them, I assure you they are.   They have three children that are now dealing with not having a home or their toys.  They have lost everything, and I hope that everyone lifts them up in prayer as they go through rebuilding their lives.  If anyone has anything that they would like to donate, please let me know.  From the smallest thing to the biggest, doesn't matter.  If you can't donate, just pray for them.

On a more personal note....Lyndsey, you have been my best for quite some time.  I love your kids like I love mine.  There is nothing that I wouldn't do for you, Gary, Eliza, Makinzy, or Jackson!  In the meantime just remember you can always lean on me....

Rylee Clementine

Today my sweet Rylee Clementine is six years old.  It feels like just yesterday we were in the hospital, debating how Caylon was going to react to having a little sister.  My heart just exploded that day with overwhelming joy and love.

And Caylon loved being a big sister.

Through the years, I have always called Rylee my hardest child.  I realize today it is because she challenges me. She wants answers to every question no matter how obscure, and she wants me on my toes because I expect her on hers.  She is definitely an attention grabber when she warms up a bit.  Her level of intelligence at her age on life matters would amaze anyone.  When John Henry died and we were explaining death to the children, Rylee simply said "He's in heaven with Jesus riding his four wheeler".  She was four, and I was blown away.  

She remembers everyone's name and their relation to her within the first five minutes of meeting them.  Over the years, she has found several outlets.  Her favorite is music. The only child I've ever seen who loves Kiss, Van Morrison, Beatles, and her new favorite...Bon Jovi.  She is a rocker to the songs she listens to to the clothes that she picks out when she walks through the door.  She dances and flips all over the place.  She started really dancing when we got the recital DVDs that the kids watched relentlessly.  She memorized every dance no matter how hard.  She was born from a boombox in every way possible.  

She has an amazing drive about her.  I admire it.  

Happy Birthday my darling Rylee.  I can't believe you are growing up so fast on me.  I love you more than strawberries.

From the Mouth of a true blue Auburn fan

I just have to say that I am extremely impressed with both teams that played in the BCS National Championship last night.  Everyone has said all football season that LSU and Alabama were the top two teams in the nation.  They are.  I've seen so many posts making fun of the fact that LSU lost today on facebook, and that disappoints me.  This is why.  When Caylon was in the spelling bee last year, how tacky would it have appeared if I stood up when a child spelled a word incorrectly and mocked them.  I can imagine me screaming "What a loser!  You can't even spell the word soil!".  Yeah.........It's classless.


We are taught as children that you can't always win, and we instill that in our children as well.  Be proud of the fact that LSU made it to the championship; don't make fun of them for not winning it.  It is okay to be excited about your team winning, but do it with class and values.  


And as a proud Auburn fan I have to say that I am so proud that our state now has three back to back national championship trophies.  So War Eagle and Roll Tide!  

First Time

So, this is the first time I have blogged since MySpace days.  I'm really too busy to do this, but I really enjoy sharing our crazy lives with random people :)

So for my first blog I would like to introduce myself and my family.  I'm Ashley Griffin Bean, and I am 28 years old.  I have four children and one stepdaughter.....and they are all girls.  I'm so catching hell in a few years, but as for now they are all amazing children that make my life worth living.  And I live.  Hard.  I work as a sales representative for Wireless Expressions, an authorized retailer for AT&T.  I've been doing this job on and off for almost 5 years, and I love every second of it.  With that being said it consumes a lot of my time.  Having 5 kids and a full time job inside and outside your home makes any free time you have gold.  And gold is hard to come by in this house :)  

Thank God for my husband, Chris Bean.  He works as hard as I do and is a huge help with the girls. 

He is the complete opposite of me.  I'm eccentric, he's laid back.  I'm always in go mode, he'd rather be napping.  We have been married for five years in August.  It has been a bumpy road, but what marriage with five other people involved wouldn't be....and yes, I'm referring to the kids.  He does have an outlet that he enjoys that gives him "man time" that he so needs.

He is the drummer for a blues band called Double Wide Soul.  Go check them out at www.doublewidesoul.com

And now....our children.  They are all different and talented in their own way.

First, the oldest girl is my stepdaughter Madison. She is 9 years old.  She is in the gifted class in school, so obviously she's a smart girl.  She loves doing everything from dancing to art to singing and dancing.  She's just like her dad-she wants to be good at everything.  Very versatile.  I love that about her.  

Next is Caylon.  Caylon is the first baby that I gave birth to and she has a different meaning to me than all of the children.  She was the first person to teach me what being a family meant and how awesome it is.  She is smart beyond her years, but she is infamous for being in "Caybug World" most of the time.  She has the largest imagination out of any of the kids and has her nose in a book at any given moment of the day.  This year she is doing musical theatre which is what she is extremely talented in.

Rylee is 5 years old and just started kindergarten.  She is my rocker girl.  She loves music...all kinds of it. She is doing sooo great in school and makes us prouder of her every day that goes by.  She makes friends so quickly.  She is also an amazing dancer, so this year she is learning tumbling.  The dents on her head proves that she is great at it, but needs to learn what wide open spaces are.  

Next are our three year old twins.  Crimson and Clover. 

Crimson is just wild.  She keeps us busy.  She is the bossy one and will tell you exactly how it is all the time.  The one thing that I can say about her that always impresses me is that she always pays everyone some sort of compliment.  Sounds like a future salesman to me :)

Clover is our sweet twin.  Clover is so loving and sweet.  She will do anything to make someone happy.  That worries me to a degree, because at some point it becomes survival of the fittest in our house.  But for now, I enjoy still having just a "sweet baby".  

So that is our whole bunch.  I hope that everyone enjoys listening to our stories, as I enjoy sharing them.